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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is a metaphor depicting the end of times in the New Testament. They describe conquest, war, hunger, and death respectively. We use this metaphor to describe communication styles that, according to Gottman research, can predict the end of a relationship. 1. Criticism.
GOTTMAN’S FOUR HORSEMEN. In his “Love Lab” Research, John Gottman identified four traits that could predict with a 90% success rate whether or not a couple would stay together. He would go on to name these four traits the “Four Horsemen”.
FOUR HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE The four attitudes that most predict the dissolution of a relationship, especially in combination, are criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling (in order of least to most dangerous). Dr. John Gottman, a psychologist at the University of Washington, studied more than 2,000 married couples over two decades.
4 sie 2019 · John Gottman’s FOUR HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE. 1. Criticism: Attacking your partner’s personality or character, usually with the intent of making someone right and someone wrong: Generalizations: “you always...” “you never...”“you’re the type of person who ...” “why are you so ...” 2. Contempt: .
recognize the Four Horsemen and do their best to avoid them. The following pages describe each of the Four Horsemen and alternative positive ways of interacting, called “antidotes.”
THE FOUR HORSEMEN AND HOW TO STOP THEM WITH THEIR ANTIDOTES CRITICISM Verbally attacking personality or character. CONTEMPT Attacking sense of self with an intent to insult or abuse.
Physiological Self-Soothing. The fourth horseman is stonewalling, which is usually a response to contempt. Stonewalling occurs when the listener withdraws from the interaction, shuts down, and simply stops responding to their partner.
